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So, your ex hits up and say's hey, "you wanna hang out I have missed you".
Wait hold on there. What am I going to do now? Because I really miss this person. I moved on my is life good, I'm happy. What should I do? Should I call him back or text him, or go have coffee, maybe a dinner date? He broke up with me. I was devastated, and I've overcome this. Now I'm scared, I'm struggling 'because I do miss him so much, the sex was so good, I am so lonely,
All I can say that is a dangerous situation, and you should not cross those boundaries. It is impossible to be friends with your ex. On just a friend's basis, granted when kids are involved the two parties must be civil for the children. You have to be mindful that the problems between you and your ex should not overflow onto the kids whatsoever.
If you have turned your life around and moved on and progressing emotionally also happy in your life.
I ask you why jeopardize that?
Very rarely do couples make it after a long separation, if time has gone by between them, one of two possibilities may happen. First a rush of emotions that you haven't addressed overcomes you and your boundaries collapse. or an opposite emotion like anger which is fear from past history reminds you of why you moved on.
True, it's possible to reconcile, however the odds are not in your favor.
I would encourage you to do a pros and cons list and really get to the core of why you broke up in the first place. Then if you still want to talk to this person, First, I would do it over the phone, to try and get a feel of what they really want. Do not pause your progression from moving on. You should be the one to say when and where to meet, be sure it's in public for your own self wellbeing.
Don't lose your happiness for something from the past. Majority of the time when there's been a significant amount of time between you and your ex of the let's say, six months, a year, two years, and they come back and say, " you were what I truly wanted".
You really need to ask yourself, if I was what he really needed or wanted, why did he take so long, and he was the one to break up with me, however long it was, to realize this, he should have realized this while he was with you. He is most likely. Lonely, horny, and wants to manipulate you into his needs, basically get laid.
Yes, at one point in time you two were very comfortable with each other, yes it feels good. But that was at one point in time. I don't think you can really hear the advice on this situation, reason I say this is "Damn it I loved him and I miss him, my coach just dosent get it"
Will you get in touch with your ex? This is totally on you. I do not recommend it. I believe it's a dangerous situation. And it can destroy a lot of progress.
I do suggest to journal. Have that phone conversation? Not in person, Zoom is always good if you want. And then see how you feel after that conversation, do you truly want to revisit this person.
You really have to be honest with yourself when you take inventory on your past relationship? The pros and con list is very helpful then you can see it, visual work I believe is very beneficial. Also, a good vibrator helps on the lonely nights.
Remember where you were and what you struggled with, and where you are now in life. Ask yourself, Am I willing to give myself again to someone that walked away from me, will I truly trust him again? Or will I be waiting for it to happen again.
Be strong Be happy until we meet again. Thanks for stopping by.
